That Is So Gay

Happy Pride Month! To kick off the month, Katrina & I attended our first ever gay wedding today! These two guys are the coolest couple, and have been together 7 years. They went to New York a few months ago and officially tied the knot and now they are celebrating with all of their friends at home. (Speaking of gay weddings... have you seen this hilarious SNL skit? Stop everything and watch it right now.) I only wish our stupid state (and country!) recognized their marriage. But we're getting there...

So much gay news!

EVENTS
I am looking forward to some great Pride events this month, including Indianapolis Pride and a local Pride Prom in my city. I kept pestering Katrina about the prom, saying "pleeeeease can we go?" and she was acting all reluctant, "I don't know babe....". Little did I know as I was sending her pouty texts about it, she had already bought tickets for us and was working on this surprise for me:

Dove will you go to Pride Prom with me? (Fuzzybug on the right with tickets)

Also coming up this month... Supreme Court decisions!!!

I will definitely be getting some use out of my new Pride tank from Target:

BOOKS & MOVIES

Yesterday I got the happy news that the book featuring my lesbian short story was published! It's available for download ($3) on Amazon, and it will be released in paperback this week (also on Amazon). It is called "Counting Down the Seconds" published by When Sally Met Sally and Freya Publications. I've only had a chance to read the first story so far, but I really enjoyed it -- it was the winning story of the contest, "Counting Down the Seconds" by Lexy Wealleans.

I am always in search of good lesbians movies (so many of them are extremely cheesy). Recently Mosquita y Mari came out on DVD. By director Aurora Guerrero, it is a beautiful coming-of-age story of two girls from immigrant families in L.A. who find themselves unexpectedly drawn together. It shows the reality of trying to make it in a new country and live up to their parent's expectations. There is something so innocent and pure about the way they develop a close connection and realize there is something more under the surface.

THERE ARE LESBIANS UPSTAIRS - update

I wrote a little while back about my new neighbors. Since then, I have gotten to know them a little better, had some nice chats, told them I'm gay (they were just as excited as I was!) and introduced them to Katrina. They are very cool and it's so nice having some lesbian friends around.

Any think big happening this month for you? Are you planning to celebrate Pride?

We saw this beautiful rainbow last night!

100 Days

In approximately 100 days I will be moving to live with Katrina and we will be starting the next stage of life together--finally! That sounds like a long time still. But there are quite a few things that have to happen in the meantime in order to make the transition, so I'm sure it's going to be here before I know it.

I've been a little out of my blogging routine lately, life just feels unsettled and up in the air. I thought I'd just post a few updates.

FITNESS
This is really the reason I knew it was 100 days. My office has begun a walking competition, we're divided into teams, and for the next 100 days we will be tracking how many steps we take on pedometers for a chance to win an iPad mini! My team is the Holy Walkamoles. Anyway, the end of the competition happens to coordinate with my move (unbeknownst to my boss...) at the start of September.

Along with this, I've also been keeping up with myfitnesspal on my own and I am proud to say I'm sticking to it. I've really been enjoying swimming again (why do I always forget how much I enjoy it?)

My motivation system = smiley stickers (I like stickers)

LIVING SITUATION
I could be moving out of my place any day now. Or in a month. Who knows? As soon as my landlord finds a replacement tenant, I'm going to be temporarily living my my parents. Not optimal, but much appreciated. I'm going to miss this apartment so much, it was my first real home that was all mine.

My blogging spot

GIRLS WEEKEND
I can hardly believe it, this weekend would have been the weekend my little sister would be getting married. She broke it off a few months ago, and she's been doing a lot better since then. I'm proud of her for doing what's best for her.

So, in lieu of the wedding this weekend, she and her closest friends, and my older sister and me are all going to stay at Katrina's place and have a girls weekend. Sort of a bachelorette weekend sans the wedding that normally follows. I've got some of these cookies in the oven right now...

Chocolate chocolate chip FILLED WITH NUTELLA (source) 

Abby, my little sis, really wants to go to a club and see some exotic male dancers... so we're probably going to do that. Me to Katrina: "Do you think it's ok if I bring a book to read?" K: "You cannot bring a book to a club!" Me: "Oh, you're right, it will be way too dimly lit to read in there." (You know you're a lesbian when you'd rather be reading than watching greased up male models bounce their junk around)

And on that note, I'll leave you all to your friday! Hope it's a wonderful weekend for you all--I'm so excited for a long weekend with the holiday Monday!

What It Means to Love Your Body

When a lot of people say "love your body" they are usually meaning "love it exactly as it is, don't feel like you need to change anything". I've talked here before about how important it is to be comfortable in your own skin and embrace your physical self.

But I think if you're truly loving your body, you are taking care of it. I suppose that means different things to different people. To me, it means giving your body it's best chance at feeling good.

My body does not feel good at the weight I'm at. I've gained almost 10 lbs since the start of the year. I have a condition called Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS). It's fairly common in women, and it is when tiny cysts grow on your ovaries. The effects vary, but basically your hormones are out of whack--you have too much testosterone which means extra hair growth where you don't want it, and acne, and your periods usually are irregular or nonexistent (which is not good for you). It is also often accompanied by insulin resistance, which means your body isn't using insulin as well as it should to process glucose from your food, so you produce extra insulin to compensate, and end up storing a lot more stuff as fat--causing rapid weight gain. PCOS is also a big cause of infertility for women trying to get pregnant (if your lady cycle ain't working right, it's very difficult to get pregnant).

One of the best ways to treat PCOS is by reaching a healthy body weight, and maintaining a good diet and moderate, but regular, exercise.

I am able to look in the mirror most days and think "lookin' good girl!". But I've been realizing that in order to fully love my body, I need to start taking better care of it.

Old habits die hard. Our culture is simultaneously feeding us images of high-calorie un-nutritious food and rail-thin photoshopped models. I feel like I need to learn to just shut all of that out and feel what I need. I have to retrain my brain to treat my body right.

On a related note, I recently discovered this beautiful healthy food blog, Skinnytaste.com, by photographer/healthy cook Gina Homolka. Her photos are gorgeous and I love her philosophy on food:  "eat seasonal, clean, whole foods and maintain good portion control. When you cook your own meals, you know you can feel good about what is going into your body.... Exercise + a well balanced diet + good sleep = a happy life"

Lovely and simple--and she has TONS of recipes! It's gotten me excited to cook more.

What do you think it means to "love your body"? Any other PCOS girls out there? How have you found a way to treat your body right? Know of any other good resources for eating well?

Family Togetherness Time and a Kitty Rescue

I feel lucky to have been able to spend some quality time with my family the past couple of days. Sometimes I don't even think I grasp how important the role of family is in shaping who we are. For better or for worse, they are a part of your identity. They are where you come from. And if you have a supportive family, they can help you draw the confidence you need to venture into the world and be yourself.

I have been very lucky in life to have the family I have. Not trying to get all sappy on you... but I really love these people. My siblings were some of the first people I came out to. My parents have been supportive of me and loved me unconditionally. My family has been a "constant" in my life, which is really a priceless gift.

Also, we are all kind of nerds and I love it. When we're together we like to play boardgames, like Settlers of Catan, compete in Wii Jeopardy, and watch funny shows together - like Modern Family. I was also beyond thrilled to go see Wicked, the broadway production, with my mom, grandma and sisters. Un. be. liev. able. I loved it so much!!!

Lookin like bad-asses getting ready for Settlers

Frodo is also an important part of the family

Found this 20 yr old pic for mother's day. (I'm on the far left)

If you follow me on twitter or instagram, you may have seen me posting about this stray cat I found. YOU GUYS... I have a problem. This poor kitty was sitting outside the apartment looking like this out in the cold...

I'm not allowed to have pets in my apartment, but I snuck her inside for a night to let her stay warm and feed her. She was very gentle and precious and loving. My heart melted.

Her fur was dirty and she was very hungry. There were some definite signs she might be pregnant, her stomach/nipples were swollen and she kept laying down on her side every chance she got. I was so torn about what to do. Ultimately I decided she needed some medical attention that I couldn't afford at the moment, so I took her to the animal shelter, where they would take care of her. They said I could submit an application to adopt her, so I am definitely going to do that. It's probably for the best since I can't keep her at my current apartment anyway.

I suppose someone might still come forward and claim her. I'm just glad she's being looked after at the moment. I'm hoping it's meant to be and she'll end up being mine for keeps once I'm moved into a new home. My sister helped me take her to the shelter, it was hard to let her go.

Hope you all had a relaxing weekend with the ones you love. And happy mother's day to all of the mom's out there!

Back to work tomorrow. This week I'm going to try to start using MyFitnessPal again for tracking food/exercise. Is anyone else on there and want to be encouragement friends? My username is ruthem.

A Few Days Off

This week I took a few days off work to spend some time with Katrina. She got a whole TWO days off of classes for her "summer break" in nursing school. So that, combined with two days of a weekend = 4 days together! We're used to 2 or 3 at the most, so that was a nice treat.

I still can't believe that in less than 4 months I'll get to see her everyday.
Can. not. comprehend.

Anyway, we tried to pack a lot in to our time. An art show, a music festival, mini excursions, walks, meals out, time with my family, movies, cuddles, putt-putt date...

But I think my favorite part was today--we went up to a nature preserve in Michigan and took a picnic lunch with us, some binoculars, and just spent several hours in a serene environment. Separate from the world... the quiet trees, the birds, the river, the sun. It's just a beautiful place, and we took our time enjoying being together.

Katrina is turning me into a birder. I can't help it! Her enthusiasm just spills over and I find myself getting excited spotting and identifying the cute little birds. Altogether this weekend we saw 50 species! Not bad for a novice (although I had quite a bit of help from my love).

By the way, CONGRATULATIONS DELAWARE - State #11 to legalize same-sex marriage! At this rate, maybe all 50 states will have legal marriage equality before the Supreme Court makes a ruling. Maybe a slight exaggeration... but the momentum is really amazing. It's almost like all these states are rushing to get the legislation through before the Supreme Court ruling...

Book Review: The Marriage Plot

"The Marriage Plot" by Jeffrey Eugenides is a love story on the surface, but takes you behind the scenes of the human heart in a love triangle of three young college graduates.

The novel begins at graduation from Brown in 1982. A time before texting or emails or social media. We meet three young, hopeful academics as they set forth on the next stage of life.

Madeleine is a smart girl. An English graduate. She loves literature--Austen, Eliot, the Brontes. She comes from a privileged family, and can't really picture life otherwise. She works on a final paper her senior year examining "the marriage plot" from victorian literature, and considers herself something of a skeptic on love--while simultaneously wanting it more than anything. And then she meets Leonard, and falls in love with the idea of being in love.

Leonard is a brilliant, troubled young man. His peers flock towards his magnetic personality, his intellectual superiority and his originality. But at heart, he is a loner. And he is fighting a battle in his mind--he is a manic depressive. His professors see him as a student with much potential, but lacks the ability to apply himself. Leonard struggles to care about much at all. His depressive state is consuming. His manic state is intoxicating. It's as though his life is being held captive by his mental illness. Madeleine meets him at his best and falls for his mind and his passion, and by the time he reaches his lowest state, she is already fallen so deeply for him, she takes on the role of caregiver.

Mitchell, the third character in the love triangle, is on the outside for most of the book. He knew from the moment he met Madeleine that she was destined to be his wife. They were perfect for one another. He builds her up in his mind as an absolute ideal, and decides to bide his time and wait for her. In the meantime, he is taking his own journey to discover life's purpose and truth. He feels a pull towards spirituality, which is generally not as accepted in academia, and sets off on a spiritual quest after college to India.

All three of them must discover what they want, what they need, and what is truth. And how love fits with those realities.

This book was rich and fascinating, with complex characters. We see deeply into each of them. Eugenides explores an interesting time in American culture--the 1980s, coming off of the high of the 70s--anti-war protests, drugs, sexual freedom, divorce, feminism. With all those things, can we still seek to have our own "love story"?

I think one of the most interesting aspects of this novel was Leonard's manic depression (now referred to as bipolar disorder). If you know anyone with this disorder, this may especially resonate with you. It really opens up your eyes to this illness and the effects it can have on someone's life.

Overall, a great read! Not light and fluffy by any means, but compelling and entertaining in it's own way. A good novel for anyone looking for a book with substance and thought-provoking complexity, paired with realistic human triumphs and struggles.

Draw My Life

I've been loving all the Draw My Life videos on youtube... and I thought: "hey, I can do that". So I did. Turns out, it was waaay harder than I thought it'd be since you kinda have to do it in one take. And my arm got really tired. And it's super long.

But it was still fun to do, and I figured it'd be nice to change things up a little on my blog with a video. :-) Enjoy!



If for some reason the video isn't showing up for you, you can view it on youtube: http://youtu.be/et6iC9sYq9o

P.S. - have you drawn your life? If so, put the link in the comments so we can watch yours too!